DAMMIT..

DAMMIT!~!~!~ WELL.. today is a normal day.. as usual.. eat and sleep and eat and shower and tv and pee and pop LOL.. hella bored -_- not allowed to go out anymore.. have to study for o level .. dang it.. * sigh more deeplpy *

But well.. i could tell that something isnt good gonna happen tomorrow -_- * sigh more * tomorrow.. my aunt is going to celebrate.. well celebreate is her own pro 0.o but then whats worst is that shes going to celebrate at my house.. WTH?i know right -_- and invite like thousand ppl to the party LOL.. hella annoying... as if this is her house -_- err hello? First.. u have to know whose house are u in -_- ( oh yea btw i didnt mention that.. i dislike this aunt very much, cz she always likes to scold me for no reason? No one likes to get scold by random person for no reasons right? Whne i talk back.. walalu eh -_- my fault again.. wth right? lol.. its just because i m younger.. so everything that i do is all wrong? cant tolerate this -_- )

Dang it!!Actually i thought i could skip that party LOL.. by going out with frens -_- but then they cant make it tomorrow lol.. so yea -_- still have to attemppt the party.. smile at her.. but actually dont feel like smiling to her LOL.. i know i might sound rude saying that.. but true story!!! LOL.. i dont think anyone of u like it either?LOL.. so yea tomorrow have to attempt her birthday T.T and need to smile a lot.. * sigh * i feel myself is so fake LOL.. but luckily i m good at acting 0.o soo dont think they ll know haha~~

( I know it may sounds awkward and childish saying these but its true LOL )

And this time really must shoot -_-!!! lol.. this blogspot is pissing me off LOL.. i tried to change my link but it didnt allow me to change.. and didnt even allow me to open my page saying got errors or what.. craps like that lah.. last night i was checking wat was going on for the whole night and still couldnt figure out... then just now Jeany was trying to help me too but couldnt find out agian.. Then i got FREAKING pissed off and got a chance to sue computer tonight and found out that blogspot just sent me and notification saying that got errors or something like that and make us cant open the page or shit like that lah~~

Since the blogspot said that but i still couldnt stop my itchy hand and just write and write lah XDD but atleast i got to know whats the problem right? After this i think i ll change to wordpress or pressword ( forgot le ) cz my frens said that blog is better lol.. so i think ima just change it as long as i m free haha~~

Well.. today i happened to read a few online love stories.. but they were all sad one.. so yea.. as i was reading i kinda wnated to cry T.T so dam touched and sad the endings >.> OMG.. stupid.. spending whole day reading those things LOL.. but but but!! only for today!! tomorrow i must really get my butttt to stick on the chair and study like a nerd XDD GO GO GO~~ i can do it ~~ XDD

>.> guess what?While i m posting this.. i m opening my friendster.. which i havent been on for a while.. then i see the featured fren... ******** ... that name.. my heart kinda trembled for a while.. i dont know why -_- but i was just scared... * sigh moer and more * i was wondering that.. whether.. we are going to be frens again?I dont expect much anymore.. not BBFFFF anymore but atleast a fren can? -_- we havent been messaging like a few mths already.. cz i know that we are not going to be together like last time anymore -_- that was just a sweet and past memories.. so yea~~ i think shes having a better life and a better fren who are way beetter than me? -_- ARGH!! How come i feel that.. i m living under her shadow -_-

Recently.. i think i m looking at the things that she gave me before.. i wonder whether she still remember our past? But i think she has forgottten -_- sometimes.. i look at my phone hoping that she ll message me back lol.. actually i could have just message her but then.. y me?y am i always the person who message her?Last time the i messaged her.. she didnt even bother to reply?I m starting to think... whether its worth or not.. maybe yes?maybe no -_- cz sometimes.. waiting is also a kind of happiness? HOLY.. why is she keep appearing in my mind?....

I remember.. last time she was always the one who flooded my inbox and and we messaged each other till cre low.. lol..eventhough we were far apart each other.. i was even so thankful that she didnt change~~ but well.. truth is truth -_- not gonna change anymomre.. shes no onger messaging me.. long distance relationship is really hard to maintain eh? -_-

GOSH.. when i needed her that badly.. where were she? I know u guys may think that.. im stupid or what? I could just look for a new fren lol.. thats just way more easier -_- yes~~ i do have now lol.. but then she was my first best fren?1st one to share secrets with.. first one to share shoes with.. first one who went to my house... first one to went out with... first one to awkward with -_- and such.. but err ARGH!! This kind of feeling is really hard to describe... i think i just miss her.. dam.. last time before my exams.. she ll always sent me messages or something to encourage me but now?not even an alphabet LOL..

We used to chat till midnight last time.. but now?In msn i chatted with her.. didnt even bother to reply and off LOL.. well.. i tried to tell my friends that 0.o and they told me that they had chatted with her too -_- and they could tell that she had totally changed and they didnt talk to her anymore lol.. am i the only one who is sooo stubborn?lol.. dont know stubborn for what i just feel kinda stubborn 0.o or maybe there was some misunderstanding between us that me and she doesnt know? Dont know.. i m really tiring.. i know i might sounds emo but tis truth.. really dam tired -_- must must must stop thinking too much about this..

I think she doesnt need me any more haha~~ got new friends over there~ who are better than me LOL.. its not better than me.. ITS WAY BETTER than me.. now... i wanna view her friendster's profile.. and dont dare LOL.. scaring that i ll see something which i dont wanna see -_- cause recently she contacts another person who is in Brunei but not me... it is other people.. whenever i view her profile.. i can see that her profile is full with that person's comment -_- and she didnt even bother to comment me lol.. i think we are over.. OVER T.T

Her birthday is coming soon.. i m panicking whether i shall err send a birthday card to her or not? Cause that may seems awkward somehow -_- and.. she didnt send mine to me lol.. soo i dont see the point what i should -_- but then.. ARGH its hella complicated!!! I m having this kind of feeling " you didnt even bother to send me and greet me, why should i greet u ? " silly huh?childish huh?i know lol.. cant help -_- i m always like this.. or maybe i shouldt be so stubborn and just send a card to her >.>

GOSH MAN~~ i wish i could confesse this feeling to her lol.. ( dont think too much its just friendship lol ) i wonder... she has a blog or not.. that time i asked her.. she didnt ven to reply me lol.. and i dont know whether she ll get to read this blog or not someday? And know how do i feel? LOL.. i know i might sounds super emo and like a no life -_- but cant help?

Soo.. ima stop here no mood anymore >.>